Dear Stranger,
A couple of days ago I read the brutal piece in Huffington Post about the bass player of The Runaways, Jackie Fox, and the rape she suffered at the hands of the band's manager Kim Fowley when she was just 15 (you can read it here ).
Many of the people in the room that night were traumatised by what happened. Equally, though, some chose to ignore it and conclude it was just something that was to be expected from him and from the showbiz lifestyle she had become a part of. Some of her fellow bandmates who witnessed it still choose to see the late Kim Fowley as a decent man who did many good things for them and their careers.
For Jackie, what happened that night over 30 years ago still effects her and her life.
It reminded me of my past. I was physically and psychologically abused by a former partner. Legal steps were taken and he can no longer communicate with me. However, the damage still remains.
There are things I am still fearful of (you may remember my comments a while ago on baseball caps...that's one of them) and I feel there are things I will never experience again as I avoid things that might risk us bumping into one another. Though he would break the law by communicating with me, the thought of just seeing him again sets off anxiety attacks.
Worst of all, there are people out there who I had been friends with who think he's a nice guy and that I'm the bad person like he says I am.
I know the truth.
Why is it that people like Jackie or myself go through hell and yet are not believed by people and are left scarred for life emotionally while the perpetrators can carry on as if nothing matters because they can fool people into thinking they're ok?
Sometimes I wish I could make it all go away and never have happened but I know I'm a stronger person for surviving it in spite of him.
More later,
Me
